I write many things* for many brands.
Those brands make many, many dollars.

*things like:

23-HOUR COUNTRY SONGS ABOUT MAYONNAISE

FLIGHT PLANS
FOR MAYO-DELIVERY AIRCRAFT

CAUTIONARY
GYM TALES,

MORE CAUTIONARY GYM TALES,

SUB
SANDWICH OBSSESSIONIST STORIES,

BIG
SLOPPY
MAYO
DUMPS,

INTERPRETIVE SALSA
REVIEWS,

SUMMER MENU
FOR 500 RESTAURANTS,

FAMILY HEIRLOOMS
IN THE EPIDERMIS,

AND OTHER THINGS.

WILD MAYONNAISE
ADVENTURES,