HI. MY NAME IS JOEL*
YOU MIGHT KNOW ME.
BUT IN CASE YOU DON'T,
I SAY AGAIN, I'M JOEL.
HELLO.
HOW ARE YOU?
YOU'RE LOOKING WELL.
FOR THE RECORD:
I CANNOT SEE YOU.
ALSO FOR THE RECORD:
I WRITE THINGS. THINGS LIKE,

*approximate appearance

23-HOUR COUNTRY SONGS ABOUT MAYONNAISE

FLIGHT PLANS
FOR MAYO-DELIVERY AIRCRAFT

CAUTIONARY
GYM TALES,

MORE CAUTIONARY GYM TALES,

SUB
SANDWICH OBSSESSIONIST STORIES,

BIG
SLOPPY
MAYO
DUMPS,

INTERPRETIVE SALSA
REVIEWS,

SUMMER MENU
FOR 500 RESTAURANTS,

FAMILY HEIRLOOMS
IN THE EPIDERMIS,

AND OTHER THINGS.

WILD MAYONNAISE
ADVENTURES,